Dispensing Welcome in a World that Prescribes Walls
Simply Sunday: 04
I used to think it was enough to “know about” other cultures and people groups. Now, I know that true relationship with our neighbors from different cultures changes everything.
When I was in high school, I had the choice to take one of two foreign language classes: Spanish or German. While learning Spanish surely would have been more useful in the region where I live, I opted for German simply because I could earn concurrent college credit through this class. Frau Carothers was a wonderful teacher, and I earned enough credit that I tested out of all required college level foreign language courses. I went on to use my German a handful of times while traveling through Germany years ago, but please don’t ask me at this point to speak it. I learned it, barely used it, and then promptly forgot it. Hoppla.
The problem? I simply wanted to know about another culture and language; I didn’t truly engage with it. I didn’t know anyone in my daily life with whom I could practice the language or engage in the culture. So, it simply became a box to check, a task to accomplish. To be fair, my family did host a German foreign exchange student during my Junior year of high school, and I did gain an appreciation for the culture through our interactions… but ultimately, I saw it as a cool opportunity and then simply moved on. I wish we would’ve kept in touch after her return home.
Fast forward 20+ years, and I have 3 daughters who have been enrolled at a Spanish immersion school since they were in PreK. For them, language learning is not a box to check; it is a useful tool for connecting with the world around them. By the time they reach 2nd grade, their classroom teacher speaks only Spanish. Because their brains are so wired to learn and engage at this point, it is not a problem for them. While it does challenge them, they ultimately thrive under the constant exposure to language, and it becomes a part of them.
Last week, we attended a community event at our school. My daughter who is in 2nd grade was talking to her Venezuelan teacher, who predominantly speaks Spanish. Nearby, our friend from Iran was speaking to her elderly mother in Farsi. The Iranian grandmother wanted to communicate with the Venezuelan teacher, but neither spoke a common language. There could have been a missed opportunity for them to communicate and express their appreciation for one another.
Instead, our friend pulled my daughter into the circle, where she asked her to help translate. The Venezuelan teacher spoke to my daughter in Spanish. My daughter then turned and spoke to the Iranian friend in English. The Iranian friend turned to her elderly mother and spoke to her in Farsi. And the circle reversed, as the grandmother expressed her gratitude for the teacher, through Farsi to English to Spanish.
It was such an ordinary moment at our international school, and yet I stood there, stuck by how profound it was. Here was my 8 year old, getting to connect with people from all over the world through 3 languages, and she didn’t think twice about it. In her world, diversity is normal, and interconnectedness is key.
When I asked her later how that experience felt she said, “Mom, I’m just a little frustrated…I couldn’t understand Farsi.”
The world my girls are growing up in is much different than the world I grew up in (and doesn’t every parent/grandparent say that?! Ok, I feel old). But, instead of romanticizing my own childhood memories and lamenting the difficult parts of this current world, I’m truly amazed by the opportunities they now have. Technology has made it possible to actually communicate with people all over the globe. Travel is much more accessible. They are speaking with people who come from places I didn’t know anything about at their age. I am confident in their generation’s ability to build bridges where there are currently walls.
The reality is that we can’t all spend our days immersed in a new language as our full-time job. Of course we have actual resources at our fingertips to learn new languages (Rosetta Stone, Duo Lingo, etc.) - and I highly recommend using those! But what can we do otherwise, on a regular basis, to connect with people whose lives look and sound different from our own?
Get curious.
There are people all around you who have different beliefs, cultures, languages. Instead of seeing them as “foreign” or speaking of them with terms that make them feel “othered”… what if, instead, you asked questions about their life, out of genuine curiousity? What if you got really intentional about forming a real relationship with a family from another country, with no agenda other than to learn from them?
We can study and read and think that we are “culturally aware” all we want. But until we take the time to build relationships with the people around us, that knowledge is like checking a box.
Relationship changes everything.
Let’s dispense welcome in a world that prescribes walls,
Dr. Peek